Heaven in a Plastic Cup


So this is what happened. I procrastinated and procrastinated aanndd, yep you guessed it, procrastinated about the Palace of Westminster and old Pugin and styles of architecture and all that good stuff.

Ten days to the deadline and I was eating peanut butter ben n jerry’s and watching Mr Selfridge. Four days before the deadline I was on my feet all day baking and cooking and kneading and jamming and dressing up for Madame Squidge’s wedding shower.

Well we didn’t call it a shower because it was just a pre-wedding party but I guess it’s a shower! We showered her with hugs and lovage and some kisses. And put sparklers on her chocolate layer cake that my sister in law and I made. We had pink pearls and purple hearts all over it and I sort of mucked up the sparklers because they kind of went up in a huge flame because I was scared of the lighter.

Which is ironic considering how friendly I was with a lighter about a year and a bit ago, when I used to puff.

ANYWAY, seventeen hours to my assignment and I was watching Friends (again) with another mini tub of Ben N Jerry’s, this time Cookie Dough. And may I just say, heaven in a plastic cup?

Nine hours to the deadline and I was up at 3am wishing Lulu a late happy birthday. Whilst feverishly eating pears and drinking actimel and sneaking digestives out of the cupboard.

Six hours to go and I decided to play and replay Speeding Cars by Imogen Heap. Came across a video showing how she edits her music. Decided she was rather pretty and decided to Google Image her. Then fell into a sticky rut consisting of Imogen Heap and Lana Del Rey, who, might I add, is bloody gorgeous.

Then I made breakfast. Not for me, for Damian. He was shocked and surprised and pleased and slightly disapproving but didn’t have time to berate me before he gave me a toothpaste kiss and ran out. Well I had to use up the eggs. Cause I am going back ‘home’ tomorrow. Where is home, though?

Two hours to go and I gorged myself with Baked Walkers. I don’t even like Baked Walkers. It doesn’t have any flavour. It’s just solid crunchy cardboard with a slight hint of old sock. I also sang a lot of Speeding Cars and recorded myself, and listened to the recording before deleting in horror and shock.

Did I really think I was good at singing? Pop goes that bubble, eh Lenora.

One hour to go and I was feverishly typing lots of stuff about the nineteenth century and the revival of the Gothic tradition. And did you know Gothic design is heavily integrated; nay, STEMS from Roman Catholicism? There’s news for me. I don’t know how to take it. I don’t much care for Roman Catholicism, really.Yet I do so love the pointy spires and detailed architecture of Gothic buildings. WOE IS ME, I SAY.

Two hours after the deadline I submitted my assignment. I was smelly, the place was a tip, my feet were ice and my nailpolish had been scratched off.

And this is my word to the folks: Never leave your assignment until two hours after the last possible moment.

Disclaimer: Luckily for me there is a ‘grace period’ which lasts until midnight on the cut-off date (deadline date). So technically I still have one hour and thirty five minutes. However, y’all might not be so lucky.


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